Today I had a very special thing happen...and after reading this you will see that it really was just a small thing that was designed for me....
For those of you that don't know, Doug is doing an internship at a church in town where I actually was attending when I first moved to Florida and was single and pregnant...a long story made short is that we left the church we were attending and where we met and got married to go back to this other church so Doug could learn more about technical worship and so forth in order to hopefully become more qualified for a job in this field....it was definitely a career move to do this but we also believe we are following God and His leading. It's a great opportunity for Doug, as this church is much more advanced in these areas. HOWEVER, I have felt like a fish out of water...I left all my friends and comforts behind and although things weren't "just right" at the other place of worship, to leave it all behind and go back to this other church that is about 20 times larger than where we were is very intimidating and overwhelming. My kids are thriving in the children's programs and that part of it I am very thankful for! But Doug is busy doing his "thing" every week so I am sitting alone in services and doing a very good job of being a wallflower.
This week we decided to stay for a small group and try to get more involved and I was so blessed because the one we chose happened to be the husband of a woman that used to babysit Lily when she was only a baby when I was attending this church as a single parent. I immediately recognized her and said "HI" and she looked at me with a blank look so I continued to tell her who I was and her jaw hit the floor and she just hugged me...I don't really think she knew what to say because here I was standing with my 2 youngest (Lily was still in her class) and pregnant...I gave her a brief re-cap of the last 7 years and then went on my way but after the class she came up to say goodbye and by then Doug was with me so I introduced them and she about started to cry and just said what a blessing it was for her to meet Doug and how she had prayed for him way back when....and how she had prayed for my situation, etc.
She didn't go into any more detail than that and we just continued on, (she was talking with a friend) knowing we would get to see her more as we continued in this small group.
It really warmed my heart because there were so many folks at this wonderful church praying me thru some very tough years and praying for a future husband that they might never meet....praying for the life of a small baby that they would never see grow up most likely and I was able to see just one of them today.
God really does care about the thoughts we have, the concerns we have, the feelings we have. I think that most of us just don't always want to acknowledge them ourselves much less verbalize them. This is just one small example of a way God demonstrated His love for me today. If I pulled myself out of myself for another moment and looked around, I'm sure I would see many, many more.
So although I still feel like a fish out of water, it's really ok. Aren't there some fish that actually fly?