My daughter Lily is quite an amazing girl. I think she is beyond her years in many ways, possibly due to her mama expecting WAY too much of her back when it was just her and I living the crazy life of working full time and running all over the place trying to get things done and so forth. One of the teachers in our Bible study today (CBS) told me that Lily is the smartest one in the class and she also is one of the sweetest with her manners and behavior. It's always nice to hear this type of feedback from others that are working closely with your kids. As a home school family, I often wonder if she's getting enough and learning enough and so forth but the more we go, the more God opens my eyes to what truly is important in life and although we do believe in a strong education, I don't believe that a strong education is exclusive to math, science, history, english, spelling, etc...I want my kids to be good homemakers, good stewards, well respected among adults (and children), lovers of purity, but mostly lovers of God. I want them to know who they are in Christ. This is something we purpose to instill in them on a daily basis...my husband is probably better at this than I am...
I often get questions from friends or strangers that wonder if we are sheltering our kids by homeschooling. I have yet to understand the meaning of this so I never have a very good answer however based on some things that have been happening lately in LIly's personal life, I have been absolutely convinced that the road we are currently on is the best for this time. Will we always homeschool? I can't say. I don't pretend to know the future and I wouldn't say that I'm a die hard homeschooler (there are some that literally scare me with their passion for it and perhaps I'm one of those people to some of you reading or some others in my life!! haha)
Lily has had one particular friend in her life comment on her weight, color of her teeth and most recently her "terrible handwriting". I literally just sit in shock when Lily tells me what her friend is saying. Why? First, i can't imagine what 7 and 8 year olds should even be aware of "yellowing" teeth...don't we spend enough of our adult years worrying about how we look and compare to those around us? (not that we should but we do) Don't we spend the majority of our adolescent and adult years worrying we are too fat or too short or whatever....why should this be starting as early as 7 or 8? My jaw really hit the floor when she said this friend is telling her she has terrible handwriting....I think she has amazing handwriting, better than my own at times...perhaps because she spends more time actually writing when i spend more time typing. Anyway, I look at my daughter's face as she's telling me these things and she is amazing in her strength. I won't say that these things haven't hurt her deeply and affected her greatly. My 8 year old now is concerned every day with how she looks and if she looks fat...etc. This only began after comments from this friend. Am I blaming the little girl? No. I think perhaps my own feelings about myself might factor into this picture although I try to never comment on my weight or looks when I'm around my kids (oh but my poor husband has to hear about it!) or perhaps the enemy just thinks he can have his way with my child but look out...Lily's parents are on a mission to save her soul from this terrible lie. (1 John 5:18)
So, although these comments have affected her, she is so loving in her response. She tells me that her inner self wants to lash out and say something ugly back to her friend, yet she calmly says "well that's fine that you think so but it's the way I am" or she says she just shrugs her shoulders and changes the subject. I am proud of her. I don't think it's sheltering her to want to teach my child how to respond to such things. Most of the things I hear coming out of kids mouths at the pool or malls or even in the churches are not exactly becoming. Where is the standard? Who are we looking to for what is and isn't appropriate? I hope the standard we have in our home is satisfying and pleasing to God and will eventually rub off on my children and stick. Ok, so does this mean Lily is always perfect in her responses? Absolutely not. But this post isn't about her shortcomings. I'm sure there will be many opportunities for that but you know, when I read God's Word, I don't see him harping on all my shortcomings. He lifts me up. He speaks words of adoration to my soul and my spirit. He speaks words of truth and LIFE over me and it encourages me to press on. And it also gives me the humility to admit when I've totally blown it. I have a daughter who admits to me when she has lied or when she has been tempted to do something I've told her not to do even though I'm not there to see. She will tell a friends mom that she's not supposed to watch a certain program or walk away from a group of people that are speaking about things that she shouldn't be hearing. I thank God for my Lily and I know that she is beautiful. God called her that before she was even formed in my womb...(Psalm 139)
