Monday, August 31, 2009

Bless The Broken Road


I've always enjoyed this song and I believe my sister danced to this in her wedding...either way, it's a great song and so many are familiar with it and have claimed it as "their song". I don't have a song with Doug. We didn't dance at our wedding...in fact, we've never danced together. Doug doesn't like to dance. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything, at least not now. I just enjoy sitting together with him over a cup of coffee or hot tea. I enjoy lounging on the couch while we talk till wee hours of the morning and he rubs my feet. I often wonder how we don't run out of things to talk about. He truly is my soul mate. I don't spend time thinking about this much at all but recently I was thinking about my past with relationships. I've been through so many broken hearts I can't even believe it. I had a high school sweetheart that I thought I would marry, I married once before and that lasted less than a year, I was engaged again after that...and sprinkled in between all those heartaches were other boyfriends. I have learned that those relationships were a quest to find true fulfillment and love....two things that can only be found in a relationship with God. It wasn't until I fully surrendered my broken heart and broken life to Jesus Christ that I was even in a position of having eyes to see what real love is all about. I "wasted" a lot of time and years on boys and men that were meaningless. I don't mean to say that those people were meaningless because some of them are great people and I was guilty of hurting some of them...but because my heart was not surrendered to God, those relationships didn't stand a chance. I pray often for my girls and pray that they will be secure in who they are in Christ and that they will not follow in my footsteps. That's another topic all together...shew! Anyway, I wanted to post these lyrics to a song that just sums it up. It sums up how I feel about my relationship with God first..but it also sums up the love and appreciation I have for my marriage to Doug and I'm so thankful that God has honored me in such a way as to bring us together. Doug was hand carved for me. And I was hand carved for Doug. I often wonder how God would have brought us together had I just remained single my entire life until I met him...it's just a mind game I play sometimes for fun...the "choose your own adventure" kind of thing..wondering how our paths would have crossed...but anyway, you get the point, right?
This picture was from our honeymoon spot in PA. Hope to return there someday...feels like we've been together forever. I love you Doug!

"Bless The Broken Road"

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

[Chorus:]
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

[Chorus]

Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you.

Monday, August 17, 2009

Values...


I love having Doug around. I really would be "ok" with him being home all the time...heh...of course we wouldn't have food to eat or money for rent...hmm...too bad you can't live on love. I've heard women talk about how irritated they get when their husbands are home too many days in a row, but I don't really understand. Don't get me wrong, sometimes Doug is gone for the evening and a teeny tiny part of me enjoys that I don't have to cook. The girls and I are HAPPY to eat peanut butter and jelly, in particularly me, since it's my favorite thing in the world. When Doug isn't home, we eat sandwiches and fruit for dinner..or perhaps just chips or something...(yikes!) Doug likes a good hot meal on nights he is home. Ok, back to the point of my post...
When I met Doug he was working about 13 hour days and many weekends. This became a big problem for me when we got married. At some point, it was cut back to about 10 hours and occasional weekends. Before we left Florida, he was working 8 hour days and never on the weekends....yes, this might sound nice, but the thing that was retarded was he was salary so back in the day when he was working 13 hour days, he was making the same as when we ended that job and he was there 8 hours a day....
Ok, now we are in Maryland...not only is he doing a job he loves and that he is MADE for, he is home SOOOO much more. We all eat together every morning and he's home in time to watch the girls while I make dinner. He has 2 days off a week and Sundays he just works during church hours...needless to say, we are together a lot as a family. It's such an amazing blessing. This might not last forever. Perhaps his job will become more involved or perhaps he'll have to get a second job if the economy keeps going down...or perhaps he'll change jobs entirely and life as we know it now will change. For now, we are enjoying what we have and we find ourselves thanking God weekly for it. We would choose family time and unity and peace in our home over the big bucks ANY day. I mean, if he could make a ton of money working a 35 hour week..fine, we would happily receive (ha!) but from what we've observed...the people making the big bucks are working considerably more than that and they are taking their work home with them and seem very distracted most of the time. This post is in defense of the comments I have gotten about his lack of drive, etc. The way I see it, Doug DOES know what he wants, and he's ran after it hard..and it's got eternal rewards.
The truth is, I don't know a more hard working father/husband than Doug. He's by far the most hands on father I've ever seen or heard of. Not to say there aren't others like him, I just don't know of them. There are many times when I think that he knows more about the girls than I do. Yet, he still feels like he doesn't do enough or that he's not a good enough dad, etc. It blows me away. Perhaps it makes ME lazy or unmotivated...I want to be like Doug when I grow up...